Nick Saraev
Body Language Coach & WriterNick is a body language coach, freelance writer, and programmer all rolled into one. He writes for Cupla on the small signals and habits that keep couples connected, driven by a passion for personal development and helping people harness their potential.
The Best Relationship Tips
1. Cut To The Quick
If you find small grievances snowballing into full-blown arguments, the solution might be keeping things clean-cut and to the point. Experts have been able to distill conversations that need to happen into four clear talking points.
Imagine your partner does something to upset you. Instead of going off on them without a plan, try to structure your conversation like this.
- This is What I Saw or Heard – What actually happened, from an objective stance. This should be brief and include only the facts
- This is What I Made up About It – By phrasing your response like this, you will make it less accusatory, and give yourself an opportunity to see the parts of your reaction that come from stories you tell yourself
- This is How I Felt – Let your partner know exactly how this story you arrived at made you feel. It’s not about your thoughts on the subject, just how you feel about it
- This is What Would Help Me Feel Better – This is often forgotten, but it can be a powerful thing to speak aloud and let your partner in on
The key to this system is brevity. Without letting your own story or anger get in the way, you can communicate what happened, why it made you upset, and how you can move forward together with vulnerability and love.
2. Cut The Phubb
3. Help, Hear and Hug
When the person you love is upset, it can be difficult to know what to do. Sometimes what makes you feel supported is more of a hindrance to them, and the right answer could be different every time.
That’s why experts are telling people to ask this question when someone is upset, do you need to be helped, heard, or hugged?
This gives your partner a chance to articulate what exactly they need at the moment.
- Help – a solution that can be acted on right now
- Hear – a listening ear for them to vent and process aloud
- Hug – Physically hugging them, or simply being a warm and comforting presence as they process
This has helped countless times in my own relationship this year, as I often find myself jumping to find a solution when all my partner needs is someone to listen.
4. Make Time For Planned Intimacy
5. Save the Date
Among all relationship tips for couples, this might be the most important one: when you’re living with someone and moving through life together, you often forget to set aside time specifically for dates. You have dinner together every night, why should going out to eat be any different?
Studies have shown time and time again that regular date nights boost a couple’s
- Communication – Dates provide structure and space for conversations that couples might otherwise miss out on
- Commitment – One-on-one time and having fun together helps to strengthen the bond that couples share
- Libido – The romantic atmosphere and focus on a date is far more likely to naturally turn into some spicy activities later on
- Sense of Novelty – When you think outside the box and go on dates beyond your comfort zone, you have fun memories and shared experiences to fall back on
- Relationship Satisfaction – Ultimately, going on regular dates is one of the most effective ways to ensure your relationship stays happy and healthy
Specifically booking a time for date night makes it special, and shows that you’re just as committed to your relationship as you are to any other facet of your lives.
What are the best relationship tips for couples?
Research-backed relationship tips include: structuring difficult conversations around facts and feelings, putting your phone away when together, asking your partner whether they need help, a listening ear, or a hug, scheduling intimacy without guilt, and protecting regular date nights like any other commitment.
What is phubbing, and why is it bad for relationships?
Phubbing – a mix of “phone” and “snubbing” – means ignoring your partner in favor of your phone. Studies show it drastically lowers relationship satisfaction, because trust and communication can’t grow with a screen constantly between you. The fix: proactively schedule unplugged time together.
Do relationship tips actually work?
Yes – when they’re research-based. Studies show couples were equally satisfied after scheduled intimacy as spontaneous encounters, and regular date nights measurably boost communication, commitment, and relationship satisfaction. The common thread: intentional effort works better than leaving your relationship to chance.
>Ultimately, the biggest thing I’d be taking into the next stage is Cupla!
A common theme across all these relationship tips is the importance of communication and making time for one another. One of the easiest ways to upgrade these aspects of your life is by using a tool like Cupla.
Cupla’s simple and innovative shared calendars allow you to schedule time for date nights and spicy rendezvous, while its built-in chat and date planner help you find deeper connections with one another.
Trial Cupla today, and see how this can take your relationship to the next level.
